She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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