I'm really into asian looking animals
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
