spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
