I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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