Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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