i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
