do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
This is the high leading the old right now
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
We have so much sex to catch up on
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
