he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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