she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
