my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
