she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
The best revenge is premature balding
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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