I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
