just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
