Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
