don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
