Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
