So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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