hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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