I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I think your dad took our porno
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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