Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
