I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
