they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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