I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
