yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
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