you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize