so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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