No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize