If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
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Are we still banned from the library?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
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Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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