like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
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im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
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I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize