i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize