it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
