She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
