i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Randomize