Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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