butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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