how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
