I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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