dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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