I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
