My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to swaddle you in tequila
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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