I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
