There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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