so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
