My cat gives me a boner
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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