I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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