he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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