stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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