This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
