HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize