i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
