I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
